discerning drunks classy alcoholics

IMG_20150624_162408First off, apologies for the delay in the English Whisky Co reviews, but moving has prevented doing a tasting. In the meantime…

Chinook Canadian Whisky: just don’t.

It’s been a looong time since we’ve been that straightforward on a review, and that should tell you something. This is bad. “Like Proof bad.” – Dan.

I got this from that same Jasper Park Liquor as the the last few items, with the explicit glowing recommendation of “uh… that’s pretty entry-level”. Damn straight it’s “entry-level”- it tasted like something that collects in the bottom of an elevator shaft.

Chinook “Canadian” Whisky is “aged in southern Alberta near the Canadian Rocky Mountains”. However, it looks like the company is from Wisconsin, with a brewpub in “the Rocky Mountain Province”*, specifically Calgary. Since Calgary’s in southern Alberta and near the mountains, maybe they ship the whisky up to age it at the pub?

* British Columbia?

chinookThe reviews for the distillery in Wisconsin are uneven, as are those for the brewpub. There’s also a pretty massive discrepancy between the bottle in the photo above, purchased as described, and what I assume is the same product (has the same abv and name) displayed on their website, seen to the right (granted that appears to be a “Limited Edition”). This is the only representation of Chinook Whisky on the website, and it calls it rye. The plastic bottle I have doesn’t say rye. In my experience, if there’s a difference between American and Canadian labeling, it’s because it’s something you can’t say in Canada, thank you nanny state.

There’s another sort of truthiness issue – when you click on the Chinook page, a guy pops up talking about how the Manhattan has been enjoyed for centuries.  I mean, I guess 150 years is “centuries”, but it’s just sort of… imprecise. Maybe I’m a pedant. No, I’m definitely a pedant, but it’s still an exaggerated representation.

I wouldn’t be so picky about how it’s presented if this wasn’t so very very terrible. Well, I might be. I probably would be. Whatever. Here’s what we thought:

Dan – flat Kronenberg
Simon – pineapple juice

Dan – sweet citrus
Simon – spicy apples

Dan – fake caramel in astringent, bite
Simon – thin fire, cognac

Dan – tart, tonic-like aftertaste
Simon – bitter burn

Dan – bog water & fake caramel, slightly musty
Simon – 3 day old vomit

Chinook Canadian Whisky – 44.9% 375ml – $ – Wisconsin/Alberta

Try it? Absolutely not. Buy it? Only for someone you hate.

4 Comments on “Chinook Canadian Whisky with Dan”

  1. Pingback: /blog » Day 848 – Chinook Canadian Whisky

  2. Pingback: BattleScotch! Chinook v Gibson’s Finest Sterling with Dan |

  3. Hahahahaha I just bought a jug of this urine. 15 dollars for a 26 which made it the cheapest whiskey in the store. I literally would gag with every sip. DO NOT BUY IT.

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